A faithful love, a shared life
Marriage is a vocation of love: a lifelong partnership in which a husband and wife give themselves to one another, welcome life, and help each other grow in holiness.
In sacramental marriage, Christ strengthens that commitment with His grace. Through ordinary days and difficult seasons, spouses are called to make God’s faithful love visible in their home and in the world.
At St. Francis Xavier, we welcome the opportunity to help couples prepare for marriage and to support those seeking guidance about their marriage circumstances.
Planning a wedding? Begin with the parish
Please call the parish office to arrange a meeting with Father Jeff. He will discuss your circumstances, explain marriage preparation, and guide you through the requirements for celebrating your marriage in the Church.
Contact the parish early, before making firm arrangements for a wedding date or reception venue. Preparation is an opportunity to build a strong foundation for your life together.
Parish office: (918) 775-6217
Why celebrate marriage in the Church?
A Catholic wedding places your commitment within the prayer and life of the Church. You ask God to bless your shared life and promise a love that is faithful, lifelong, and open to children.
Marriage preparation gives you time to discuss communication, expectations, family life, faith, and the responsibilities you will share. The aim is to prepare for a marriage, not simply a wedding day.
If one of you is not Catholic, please contact us. Father Jeff can explain the permissions and preparation appropriate to your situation.
If your story is complicated, you are welcome
You may be separated or divorced, have more than one previous marriage, or be unsure whether your present marriage is recognized by the Catholic Church. You may have stayed away because you assumed nothing could be done.
Please do not decide that your situation is hopeless without speaking with a priest. What you have heard about Church requirements may be incomplete, and there may be a path forward you have not considered.
A conversation does not commit you to a process. It gives you an opportunity to be heard, ask questions, and learn what applies to your circumstances.
No particular outcome can be promised, but you do not have to sort through these questions alone. Call the parish office and ask to speak with Father Jeff.
Understanding annulments
An annulment, more precisely called a declaration of nullity, is a finding by a Church tribunal that a marriage lacked something essential for validity when it began. It is not a Catholic divorce.
It does not erase the relationship, deny the experiences you shared, or affect the legitimacy of children. Responsibilities toward children remain.
The Church takes previous marriages seriously, including marriages celebrated outside the Catholic Church. Civil divorce alone does not establish freedom to marry someone else in the Church.
Father Jeff can help you understand whether a tribunal process is needed and how to begin. Different circumstances may require different procedures, so another person’s experience may not match your own.
If a previous marriage needs review, wait until your freedom to marry has been established before setting a wedding date.
Read clear answers to common questions about annulments.
Bringing an existing marriage into the Church
If you married civilly or outside the Catholic Church, Father Jeff can help determine whether your marriage is already recognized or whether further steps are needed.
For some couples, the appropriate path is convalidation: entering a valid marriage through a new exchange of consent in accordance with Church requirements. It is more than adding a blessing to an existing ceremony.
The appropriate steps depend on your circumstances, including any previous marriages. Begin with a conversation rather than trying to diagnose the situation yourself.
Learn about convalidation and bringing your marriage into the Church.
When a marriage is struggling
If your marriage is marked by conflict, distance, or uncertainty, you are welcome to seek pastoral support. Father Jeff can listen and help you consider appropriate resources, which may include professional counseling.
You do not need to wait until a crisis to ask for help.
Helpful Catholic resources
- Annulments: questions and answers from For Your Marriage, an initiative of the U.S. Catholic bishops.
- Convalidation: Bringing Your Marriage into the Church.
- Diocese of Tulsa and Eastern Oklahoma Marriage Tribunal, which handles petitions for declarations of nullity.
- For Your Marriage, with guidance for engaged couples, spouses, and families.
Whether you are preparing for a wedding, seeking clarity about the past, or hoping for a new beginning in faith, please reach out. We would be glad to walk with you.